My job

     I went back to my job in May of 2008.  I had just lost my Mom in March.  I was extremely sad and lost and that Easter we were invited to some friends for dinner.  I was reluctant to go and was talked into it.  We were first going to meet for drinks at S.T.,  and have some  laughs.  One of my bff's, who also used to work at S.T., and her family, and ours, were meeting.  We walked in which is always a warm, fuzzy feeling in the old lodge.  We were warmly greeted by some old co-workers, ordered drinks by the roaring fire and cozied up on the couches.  Jordan and Hannah went to the cookie jar.  They remembered where it was.  Everyone was coming out to say hi and catch up a little.  It was a happy moment for me.  I had forgotten for a little while how sad I was thanks to my friends who talked me into going out. 


     We were wrapping it up, getting ready to leave and Jordan said she was going to the office to say hi.  My ex manager came back to say goodbye to us and as we were leaving she said to me "so Jordan says you want to come back and work here."  I said, "Not really.  I'm not looking for a job."  She said, "Do you want to come back and work?"  That got me thinking.  I told her I'd call her the next day and we'd talk. 
    
     I called her the next day and we met.  I was pretty skeptical and didn't know if I should go back to the job I had left so bitter and unhappy.  However, 6 years had passed and I had changed.  So had everyone else.  I took the job, part time.  It was the best thing I had done for myself considering how miserable I had been.  I had been crippled with sadness and let the couch consume me. 

     My first night back was scary.  Nothing had changed.  Everything was set up the same.   The skirt I used to wear was still hanging up in the wait room.  And the maternity dress that made it's rounds that I bought from a maternity store at a mall in Denver, was still there too.  I think they hung on to that just for a good laugh.  A couple of us wore it.   I remembered to plug the soup crocks in separate outlets otherwise the breaker would trip.  I remembered to put the bar keys on the hook in the bar where it had always gone.  I remembered to put the pad locks on the towel rack on the wall under the espresso bean grinder.  I remembered that the bottles were to be set up vodka, gin, rum, tequila, whiskey, scotch, in the well, right to left.  I had originally done that years ago as a standard for everyone and it stuck.  Even the spiel we gave about the menu was the same.  I now just had to master that.  It was weird to be working again.  Especially at the restaurant where I lived a great portion of my life.

     My Mom LOVED that restaurant.  She was so sad the day I decided to leave.  She had known the laughs it brought me and the fun I had.  She had known that after a hard day of taking care of an infant and a 2 and a half year old, I'd need a so called break.  Working nights at the restaurant gave me that break from the kids.  I worked through years of watching my kids grow up and missing homework, school functions, but not many.  I worked Christmas's, Easter's, Halloween's, Thanksgivings.  She had known the money was good.  She had known how much I liked being part of a working family.  She had known that it was in my blood.  The old building, the mountains surrounding it, the history of the place.  Something inside of Jordan must have known too.  There is no other explanation for her to just run into the office and tell my manager that I wanted my job back.  I had never said anything like that.  Somehow, someway it was meant to be for me to be working there again.  I'm glad I'm back.